Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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