just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
