Its about making memories worth repressing
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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