"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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