totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize