It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
