i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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