Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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