Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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