did you get engaged???
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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