you're like a bully in the Christmas story
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize
