ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
