if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
