I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
