Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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