I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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