It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
