Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
