he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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