and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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