i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
