I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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