fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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