VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
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he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
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Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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