Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
