I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
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