Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize