This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I won't apologize to a one balled man
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
