he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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