i'm signing you up for texting rehab
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?