i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
