youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.