We won't sleep together?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Randomize