dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize