Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
