so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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