haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize