it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
