How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
