just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
