we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
