shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
