What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
