we have officially mastered the walk of shame
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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