ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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