remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
