Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize