I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
