If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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