I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just gift wrapped bread.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
