So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
